Where are you?
In a non slutty way
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
the insurance claim form from last night says foreign object removal from genitourinary tract so as far as the insurance company knows, it could have been a gerbil
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