I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
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