We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
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