Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Randomize
