The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
I just got caught impersonating a t-Rex by my boss. Sadly he wasn't fazed by my behavior and acted like it was normal.
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
Randomize
