i'm returning your mother's day gift to finance my alcoholism over the next week.
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
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