i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
Randomize
