Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
I had to put my dog down, accidentally outed my brother, and was given a fucking fish sandwich instead of a Big Mac ALL IN ONE DAY! Am I really the person you want to consult for advice? Hhhmmmmmm?
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Randomize
