I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
Randomize
