Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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