hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
Well that's the second time I've broken a lamp during sex this month. Starting to worry I'm some kind of X-man. (this one was a wall sconce and I fully smashed it with my head and it crumbled like it was made of sugar)
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
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