Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why can't people give useful wedding gifts...like sex swings or Nutella?
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
Maybe singing about how you'd bang Morgan Freeman to the tune of Single Ladies while holding champagne and a box of Cheerios wasn't the best first impression on his parents
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
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