alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
I wish there was an emoji for sad lady boners
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
Randomize