Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(432): View more from Texas

ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...

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(918): View more from Oklahoma

Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it

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(450): View more from Quebec

I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life

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(740): View more from Ohio

he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.

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These 19 Deaths Are Ironically Hilarious
Read it at the TFLN blog
(203): View more from Connecticut

Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.

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(303): View more from Colorado

I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses

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(707): View more from California

I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.

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(303): View more from Colorado

I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support

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(315): View more from New York

Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?

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