Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
Randomize
