but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
Every concussion has its silver lining
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
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