hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
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