But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
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