I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
Randomize
