Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
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