I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
Sorry about the voicemail last night, people in hostel thought getting the clap from cheating on me wasn't enough and you hearing a 6 foot 5 Swedish dude bang the shit out of me was needed.
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
Randomize
