Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
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