Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
27 Signs That Someone Will Probably Be Bad At Sex
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
23 Proposal Horror Stories You Won’t Believe
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.