oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
You pole danced in your parka.
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Randomize