let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
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