there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
I found a body half wedged into my bedroom wall this morning. How do I explain THIS to the carpenters?
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
I have post one night stand depression
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Randomize
