did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
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I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
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Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
When I told her I was deaf and took my hearing aids out at night to sleep, she said it must be nice not having to hear drunken roommates having awkward sex late at night.
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