i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
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