Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
I'm at the store buying a new phone cause I pissed all over mine last night. Drunk me is expensive as shit.
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Randomize
