You called information & said "connect me to johnny depp" when they told u it wasn't listed u said " try depp comma johnny he's expecting my call"
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
Randomize
