I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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