Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
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