I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
i grabbed his hand and told him i loved him and then he looked down and said "i love...mallomars" and shoved like three in his mouth. never been so embarrassed.
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
I flashed the bar tender last night. Apparently I wanted a whiskey to go and that was the golden ticket. This is why I never come home
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
Randomize
