Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
Randomize
