do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
And the cops told us we were all naked.
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
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