if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
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