If I could text you the sound of me vomming, I would.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
Block me from your phone tonight…I need to get laid tonight. But you've been being a douchebag. So not by you. But I might call you. So block me.
WHY WOULD I COCK BLOCK MYSELF???
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
Randomize
