I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Randomize