So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
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