she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize
