i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
Ever have the mailman look at you like youre a chronic masterbator. I have.
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
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