I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
my mind is a poorly written porno when i'm drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
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