The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
Randomize
