just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize
