Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
I am 48% hangover, 48% bruises and 2% fingers I'm texting with.
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
Randomize