it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
You snapped me at 3am drunk laying on your floor asking if I knew how we couldn't have predicted the housing crisis.
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
Randomize
