One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
While I was dancing with him in my foil dress he said, "You're like a Chipotle burrito. Don't worry, that's the best complement you could get from me."
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
Randomize