Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
I now know he's been cheating for a while. I also know HER name, address, phone number, Facebook account, religion and zodiac sign. I feel like I'm earning my restraining order. Point is, never fuck over a librarian.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
Randomize
