I got into an eating contest with Christina. I ate 6 oranges.
Why? Who won?
we don't know. we ran out of oranges.
if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
bring money and cleavage
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
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