I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
Your topless pictures make me question reality
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
Now: to brush my teeth, put on my grandma slippers and earplugs, masturbate to 50 Shades and then PTFO
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
Randomize
