I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
After the baby comes, I'll make us White Russians with my breast milk. That will teach her about sharing.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
I just sent an "I'm sorry I forged a prescription in your name" email. It was one of the more awkward things I've done this week.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
