Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
No subtext here. People are naked.
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
He just got dropped off drinking a flask, sitting on the handlebars of a chinese delivery man's bike
Tonight's gonna be epic. Did he bring my noodles?
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
If I die, sorry about rent.
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
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